Welcome to Mellie's mind...

Where thoughts can be funny, can race at all hours of the day and night and can sometimes not make any sense!

Enjoy the ride!

Tuesday, July 12, 2011

If only.....

I think Tim McGraw says it best with his lyrics:

"I think I’ll take a moment, celebrate my age
The ending of an era and the turning of a page
Now it’s time to focus in on where I go from here
Lord have mercy on my next thirty years"

My High School reunion is coming up, 20 year reunion.  How does that happen?  I recall being in my teens and hearing the words "20 year reunion" and thinking of a bunch of old people sitting around talking about the glory days... now I am weeks from my own.

The other day I found myself lost in thought thinking about my High School years.  Those were not easy carefree years like I am ensuring my two boys are currently having.  There were a lot of things going on in my life, some not so positive or healthy.  I found myself wishing.. "If only I could go back and do it again, I would make High School so much better."  My mind tells myself all of the things I would do differently and how I would be a different person and how I would not waste my education and time on such silly things that I did... the words repeat over and over in my head...

"if only"
"if only"
"if only".....

I really found myself getting sad about the time wasted and the opportunity wasted until... I had a God smack.

What was there to be sad about?  Here I am 38 years old, I have a great life a great family and I still have AT LEAST another 20 years in me!  I tell one of my clients all the time "don't worry about what you did, worry about what you are going to do to change your life!"  That is me....

I do not need to worry about what I did not do in those High School years and start planning on what I WILL do in MY next 20 years!

 I really believe you can turn around your moods, your behavior and your feelings if you just look at the situation with a positive spin rather then a negative.  So rather then letting the words "if only" ring in MY head I am going to let these words ring out instead....

"I will"
"I will"
"I will"

Watch out for ME in the NEXT 20 years!

Take it away Tim McGraw.......

Saturday, July 2, 2011

The skinny on Skinny Bitch

Off the suggestion of a potential client I read the book Skinny Bitch by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin.

I have to say that I was extremely disappointed. The authors spent the majority of the book quoting other authors and scientist in regards to the poor quality of our meat, farms and the back dooring our politicians do with meat companies.  Unless you live under a rock, this is not new news.  Unless you have not turned on the TV, radio or even searched the web you already know if you are not buying organic you are buying food that is covered in chemicals and injected with growth hormones.

Their in your face tactic and approach was just them swearing in the book and calling their reader a fat pig, lazy, an idiot and a bunch of other names.  Personally, if I was still 75lbs over weight this would not motivate me, it would infuriate me instead.

I wish they would have just said what this book was about, it is about being vegan, when they finally got past all the swearing, name calling and statistics about the food we eat it comes down to a short book about being vegan.

I have no issues with being vegan, I know that some people react differently to animal products and dairy but call the book what it is... a vegan book, and a pretty short one at that.

Friday, July 1, 2011

Getting healthy is the harderst thing I have ever done.

Yep, I said it.  Do I need to say it again?

Getting healthy is the hardest thing I have ever done!!!

I have not lived an easy life.  I grew up without a father, a mother who was more interested in her own needs then the needs of her three kids, I have been homeless, divorced (a couple of times) a single mother for years, suffered from depression, and unemployed.  NONE of that compared to my journey of getting healthy and changing my future.

My journey started 6 years ago after the birth of my third child, a daughter I had with my new husband.  My husband was very motivated to "help" me get off the baby weight.  We had everything we could possibly need in the garage and he would spell out exactly what I needed to do, it was all there for me all I had to do was the work. THAT was the problem, the work.

Sure, he would tell me what exercises I needed to do, but I had no clue what I was trying to achieve. On top of that I continued to starve my body thinking if I ate less that would get me down to the weight I wanted to be at.  Or if I was not starving myself I was making myself and my family instant potatoes, mac and cheese, canned foods I had no idea that the little work that I was doing was being wasted because I did not have the entire plan in place.

Over the next three years I had two more kids and continued an endless battle of trying to lose weight.  But that was the KEY.... I was trying to lose weight.  My goal was to get skinny, get the scale down to a smaller number and try and look like the wife I thought my husband wanted me to be.

At one point in our lives we have to say to ourselves and to those around us:  "I am NOT going to try and lose weight anymore.  I am NOT going to go on a diet anymore."  Instead we need to be honest and be true to our bodies and say:  "I am going to get healthy."  

We live in a society that pushes images of skinny girls on us and makes us feel if we do not look like that too we are not worthy.... BUT we are!

I am happy to be in a better place in my life., I am healthy, I feel great and of course the weight came off. Now I am happy to be heading into the next chapter of my life.. getting others healthy as well.

Watch out... here I come!

Funny things my kids say....

09/08/08 One day when Elianna was crying Gabriella gave her binki to her. Gabriella came up to me and said....
"Mom, I saved the day!"

Gabriella and Michael were walking up the stairs together when she looked at Michael and announced to him...
"I am the Girl in THIS big house!"

Gabriella: "I like all my family!"

If I tell Gabriella that we are going to do something she will say...
"Okay Mom, that sounds like a great idea!"

Gabriella and I were making cookies together one day. She asked if she could eat some of the cookie dough so I gave it to her. She looked at me and said...
"Your the best mommy in the world."

Gabriella's babysitter, Cindy, told Gabriella that she had to pick up her toys and get ready for her rest. Gabriella aksed Cindy..."If I don't pick up my toys I go straight to bed?"
Cindy responded, "yes."
Gabriella said "I'll just go straight to bed then."

Daddy walked outside to go to the BBQ in the backyard. As soon as Gabriella heard the door open she started to scream.. "wait for me, wait for me."
By time she got to the backdoor it was already closed and daddy was outside. She stood at the glass door in a real quiet voice she said... "Oh, dear."

Reuben and Gabriella were playing in the cupboard in the kitchen, they had closed the door and were sitting in there together in the dark. Gabriella flung the door open and announced..
"Welcome to outer space Reuben!"

Gabriella introduced Reuben to a little friend of hers. When the little girl said "Hi Reuben" Gabriella said.. "NO, his name is BABY Reuben!"

Thursday, March 17, 2011

Thoughts have power, and you have got to harness that power by chaning how you think.

The title of this blog says it all.

One of my friends always says to me that her and I are the drivers of the "Crazy Train."  We will make jokes to each other on facebook or in text that says... "choo choo" or "slow down so I can jump on the train".... in reality we both know that we allow our minds to run away with our sanity.

Unlike most people I can admit this and try and learn from it, but what really stands out to me is how often this happens in the lives of others around me especially when it comes to losing weight.

Like most people, you look at exercise and fitness as just one more thing to do, something you "should" do. You do your best to "fit it in" to your otherwise full life. You start an exercise routine with the best intentions and then stop soon after.

If you are thinking about being fat, worrying constantly about weight, then you are actively working against yourself. Your negative thoughts and feelings have created your weight problems and have made you unhappy with yourself. It’s time for you to break the cycle.
You can do that with “Metaphysiques.” This is a powerful mind body practice. Instead of focusing on being fat, you have got to focus on being fit. If you think healthy, it eventually will become a reality for you. Choose to focus on thoughts that feel good, and are positive, is a sure way to create the body you want. The by-product is a beautiful, sexy body. Start thinking exactly how the people with hot bodies think.
At the same time, do not hope; KNOW that you will lose the weight. Just like everything in life, great things come to those who work for a goal and assume the outcome will be in their favor. You’ll be sending out the right energy, and its energy that creates your new reality.
Every one of us has the power to think ourselves into a positive situation. You can do things you never thought you could do. You will create the body you want, starting with your personal dialogue about yourself. Thoughts and feelings turn into actions, and actions turn into reality. Remember, you are opening a new chapter in your life, one that is much more in control and energized.

Don’t fill your head with negative self-talk like fat, ugly, or failure. This inner self-loathing conversation is toxic and success blocking. If you think that you can’t lose the weight, then you know what you are right! The word can’t get so stuck in your subconscious mind that your body believes it and obeys it! You have trained your mind to believe you can’t and now you have told your body the same thing.

Thoughts release neuropeptides-chemicals of emotion - that travel to cells with ever we think or speak. They affect the tension in your muscles, the rate of your heart, your ability to digest food, your overall health, and more. Angry, bitter, or critical thoughts produce chemicals that depress your immune system, make you sick, and keep you fat.

How do you get rid of this negativity?

First, you have to make yourself aware of it.  Much of the dialogue that goes on is so comfortable to us that we don't know it's happening.  Second, try to catch yourself thinking negatively about yourself; then say your name out loud followed by stop. Third, rephrase your thinking - out loud - to be positive.

For example, sometimes you may feel insecure about your workout you just did.  Say out loud:
"Michelle, stop! You did your best at the workout and it is going to pay off!"

It is like flipping a switch from negative thoughts to positive empowering thought.  The more you can practicee this the more your thoughts will change to positive ones automatically, and you won't even have to think about it anymore.

You should also frequently say to yourself "I am on my way to changing my life ad I'm proud that I am motivated to change."  Other mantras you could say:

I am getting healthier and more beautiful every day.
I love myself and deserve a healthy body.
I don't need fat anymore.  I am strong.
Changing my body will change my life.

Use powerful, present-tense verbs to boost yourself to a new thought level:  I'm trying to lose weight.... I'm planning to exercises.. I'm hoping to eat healthier... this will help you subconsciously reinforce success.

Thoughts and feeling have power; they can help or hurt you.  Lose the negative thinking and negative emotions and you'll lose the fat.