- We will never mention divorce.
- We are in this together. We have been separated, we were all but divorced in the State's mind and we choose to come back together because this is where we both want to be. We will not use this fear tactic to gain our way or make our point even louder. This is not an option.
- We will not speak ill willed about each other to others outside of our marriage.
- It is hard enough to be in a fight but when you drag in a 3rd party to hear your side of the problem all you do is create more drama and more ill willed feelings toward your spouse. Our issues will remain in our household with each other under God.
- We will not bring up the past hurts and the past challenges that do not pertain to the situation at hand.
- Too many times you want to have a score card or you want to bring up the past hurts. If it has nothing to do with what the issue at hand is then there is no need to bring it up.
- We will only be honest with each other no matter what.
- There is no reason to try and get ourselves out of a situation that we are facing by telling a lie or making the other person believe something that is not. This is just building a house of cards that will fall on us one day.
- I will not challenge or confront my hubby while he is at work.
- This has been a terrible habit I have seen develop over the years. I find something out that I am not happy with and I either pick up the phone and call him or I send him a text. At the time I am trying to deal with the issue but in reality I am hiding behind technology and being a coward.
- I will learn to continue to control my words and my tone when speaking to my hubby in a disagreement.
- The level of my voice and the tone of it can make or break any argument; I must learn to control this if I am to have any kind of opportunity to get to the heat of the disagreement.
- I will learn to "stay within myself" when I first get upset. Rather than lashing out I will try and get myself calm and even pray asking for God to help me. My hopes will be to maintain control, no matter how hurt I am feeling, and not drag myself or my hubby down that hole.
- I will remind myself that my hubby is not against me. He is not out to make me look like a fool, he is not out to hurt me, he is not out to embarrass me and he is not out to deceive me. His actions are his actions but I KNOW he is not trying to hurt me. I need to remember this because if I do not feel like I am on the attack I think I can handle my emotions better.
- I will remind myself that it is him and I in this world.... together.... we have to remain partners in every area of our lives.
- I will remind myself that I cannot fix everything and some things I need to leave with God.
***I have a couple friends who are struggling in their marriage. I challenged them to take the Love Dare with me. This is a 60 day love challenge based off the movie FireProof Your Marriage. I have started this challenge in the past but not fully dove into it or completed it so I thought if I got these ladies to do it with me we could all work through it together.
I am always looking for ways to improve my marriage, my faith and my relationship with my hubby. I am doing this for me more so than FOR him. It is about changing who I am and who I want to be as a wife and mother and child of God.****