Welcome to Mellie's mind...

Where thoughts can be funny, can race at all hours of the day and night and can sometimes not make any sense!

Enjoy the ride!

Tuesday, July 29, 2014

I am......

If you have been following my blog you know these cards are called the I Am...... Cards.  The idea is to pull a card each day to read a positive affirmation to fill your mind with.  By focusing on positive thoughts, you can change how you feel and the way you think.  It's a simple way to experience life in a new and exciting way, and to explore your mind with the thought behind the "I am".... card of the day.

FINALLY!!!!!!!  A card that I can agree with and not think anything negative about myself... woot woot, progress!!!! (smile)

Yes, yes, yes.. I am.... open!!!!

Too MANY things in my life. I am open to lessons in life, help, encouragement, constructive criticism,  hard work, learning new things.  I am open to laughter, tears, healing, to new friends, to old friends, to helping people;  to family, love, new beginnings, closing old chapters, counseling, new adventures, hearing people, learning new things or new ways to do something.  I am open to a better relationship with my God, and to understanding myself and the impact I have on others.

Yes, I am a very open person.

I don't think I have always been this way, however.  When I was first married to Joseph, I had been living a single life for almost ten years.  Sure, I had dated but never got close to marriage.  So when Joseph and I  married I had been living MY way only having to really worry about myself and my two boys.  Getting into a new partnership and marriage was a struggle for me, at first, because I was not open.  Sure, I was open for HIM to change to my way of living, but was not at first open to accepting his way of life.  After all, he had not been married before, he had no kids at the time so in my mind, I had all the answers.  (Divorced twice before, but I had the answers???? That made me laugh out loud when I typed that!!!).

But as our time progressed together and we both grew, I was able to not only allow him into my world, I allowed his thoughts too just as he did with my thoughts and ideas. I would say this is really when I began to learn to be open as a person.  Being open to me does not mean you conform to the way a person wants you to be, it just means allowing yourself to see things from another point of view.  To me, it means being open to seeing yourself and being able to humbly change who you are for the better.  Joseph really helped shape the woman I am today in this area, and many others, because we were able to allow each other to freely share our own life experiences and then together we would grow over any situation.  Growing within yourself and with your partner is one of the best things I think people can do.

I have a friend who was sharing a situation with me about her mother and the strained relationship she has with her.  The mother has taken a new interest in my friend's life, and my friend is not too sure how to handle it or how to feel about it.  When I listened to her thoughts my response to her was simply "You have to do what is right for you and your family and if it feels good then build a new relationship with her, if it doesn't then don't force it."  But it all comes down to being open.  My friend has to decide if she is open to idea of trying to build a new relationship between her and her mother, but that is only something she can choose.

Recently, I struggled with my faith and my relationship with my God.  I felt abandoned by Him and felt as if He turned his back on me.  I began reading a book called The Healing Choice by Brenda Stoeeker and Susan Allen.  The book discusses a woman who, for more dramatic reasons, felt the same way about her relationship with God as I did, but describes how she was able to be open to God and the struggles in her life and learn from them as well as find herself even more closer with her God.

I like the book because it reminds me how in certain areas of my life, due to reasons out of my control, I closed down to a few things, and was not my normal self. One of  the things I became closed to was my relationship with my God.  But this book helps me understand and gives ideas on how to heal those trials and tribulations, allowing me to continue to be the open person I am in my life.

Someone recently told me that "People at our age do not change.  Who we are today, is really who are going to continue to be, good or bad."  I don't buy into this theory.  I think we all have the OPPORTUNITY to grow, learn and change every single day that we breath.  It comes down to wanting and making the choice to grow.  I go to bed at night and when I wake up, I am not the same Mellie that went to bed the night before.  Something is always changing about me, and I am always looking on how I can improve myself both physically and mentally.

So yes, I am a very open person and this card made me smile when I pulled it from the little bag on my desk.  I hope that in my life I can teach my children, family and friends that they too can be open to anything and everything and we do not have to just sit by and tell ourselves.. "Well, this is who I am. No reason to change now."  Change is good and change brings new life to everything.  I will continue to be an open person, and I hope if you are struggling with this you can finds new ways to be open too!



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